Find time to reflect

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After not having written on my blog for a few weeks, I have returned :) With the business of life, my creativity levels sunk and I felt I had nothing to say to all you amazing people! While I hate to feel stumped, I would hate even more to put a post out there that didn’t feel right.

In my absence I have found much time for reflection and have only just come to realise its importance! Usually I am very busy and often don’t think twice about decisions I make and how they are effecting my well being. On Wednesday night I was blessed with a situation that forced me into reflection. I was forced to think of all the choices I had made that got me to that place and and forced to realise it was my fault I was feeling that way.

Self-reflection-quoteIt’s hard to admit that we make bad choices and even harder to actively change our ways so that we won’t find ourselves in that situation again. I have only just begun to realise that if I can make more time for reflection, I’ll be more present in my decisions and feelings and perhaps won’t make the decisions that I tend to make time and time again that leave me in a place of disappointment.

Sometimes it’s hard to reflect though, we forget about it and if not reminded daily, it could be weeks before we think of a certain situation again and how it made us feel. So this weekend, set aside a little time to reflect. Remove yourself from your place of comfort and go for a walk, to the beach, or anywhere that you don’t visit everyday.

When you are at this place have a think of all that has happened to you and around you lately. And not just a little think but a long, hard think. Allow yourself to remember how situations made you feel and if it was a negative feeling, perhaps try to discover what you could of done differently, so that you didn’t end up in this negative place. After you have reflected on the situation it is important to let it go, holding onto negativity will just hurt your soul, so reflect, learn and move on.

I often find looking over quotes helps me too. I’ll go onto Instagram or Pintrest and scroll through many quotes, reading, absorbing and understanding what they truly mean and how I can apply them to my life. Try different forms of reflection, perhaps writing helps you, or thinking things through as you work out. Whatever it is that helps you reflect, do it. And not just today, but everyday – even only for a few minutes.

This is my challenge to myself too: to reflect daily so that I can find myself in more positive situations and less negative ones.

Here’s to the weekend and to making time for reflection!

Lots of love,

Kirstin xx

Trust in the process

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Life has a funny way of working out, even if we never thought it would…

Things often seem impossible, plans fall apart and we are left wondering what on earth we are to do next!

But what a wonderful place that is to be in – because did you realise that having no plans in place allows you to be open to whatever will come your way…

And trust me, something good is most certainly on it’s way for you!

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A few weeks ago I was terribly lost, although I had come to terms with this feeling, I still struggled to have faith and to remain positive that something amazing was on it’s way for me. I spent a good few weeks, perhaps even a month and a half in this confused place, but I am glad that I did.

I chose to stay in this place because opportunities that arose didn’t quite feel right for me, I knew something was coming but just didn’t feel like it had reached me yet.

However one day I was offered an internship with a fashion magazine, then the next I was working for them, meeting all the team and even getting my on signature made up for my staff email because they wanted me to be part of the team so badly.

Here I was, convinced that my journalism degree was a waste of time and now I have a job in the industry and still have a few months of studies to go!

I feel so very blessed to have been offered this opportunity but even more thankful that I allowed myself to be patient. For if I had of taken up any other opportunity just because I was stuck in a place of insecurity, I would not have been able to put the time and effort into the internship which landed me an amazing job.

So if you’re in between things, stuck wondering what to do next, unsure of which direction to turn, stay there a little longer, be patient and have faith that something amazing is on its way to you!

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Trust in the beautiful, crazy but oh-so amazing process!

Lots of love,

Kirstin xx

Listen to your gut feeling

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A few weeks ago I was talking with a yoga instructor about intuitive feelings. If we learn to listen to these feelings, she said, we get a strong sense on “YES ABSOLUTELY GO FOR IT” (she threw her arms out wide and beamed with a smile) or “no that isn’t going to be a good option for you” (she wrapped her arms around herself in a protective way).

I have known about intuitive feelings for a while, but only really started noticing them and acting on them when I was 18 and ending a serious relationship. But gut feelings don’t just come up when you are facing a big decision, they come up with every decision you make, if you listen closely enough to yourself.

For me, if I am faced with a decision and go with the option that is against my gut feeling (probably because I chose to ignore it or just acted so quickly that I didn’t give myself the time to figure out was best), I will feel anxious, nervous, pain in my chest and normally very on edge. Sometimes I even tear up or just have a lump in my throat. When all of these signs start to happen, it’s only then that I relaise I am going against my gut feeling. My body starts physically giving me signs to steer me in another direction.

But if I give myself time to think about a decision and realise what is best for me before acting on it, my body is much happier for it. I feel calm, at peace and as though my heart is smiling.

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While all of these feelings can come up in daily settings, I know not all of them are intuitive, for example, feeling anxious before a presentation certainly doesn’t mean you should walk away from it by any means! You just have to listen to yourself, your body and your spirit deep down know what is best for you and what isn’t, so trust them.

For those of you that are not in tune with your intuition, guided meditations and yoga are a great place to start. Spending time alone, in quiet places, like walking on the beach, also helps.

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My intuition has never lead me wrong, the only ways I have been lead wrong in the past is if I completely ignore it or act too quickly! So I am going to try to avoid doing those things and hope my life can remain relatively peaceful as a result.

I encourage all of you to get in touch with your intuition – start listening to yourself. In society so many people tell us what to do each day but there’s only one person who knows what is best for you, and that is you!

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Wishing you so much happiness and peace,

Lots of love,

Kirstin xx

Never Compromise

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Lately I have been feeling a bit down because I am in my final semester of university, and feel like my degree hasn’t really gotten me anywhere in particular. I have no idea what I will do next year or with my life in general and have just been feeling a bit stuck.

People have told me to do post graduate studies because it will get me to where I want to be. But three years at university sure didn’t help me get there, so why would two or four more years?

I feel as though a university education just makes you become like everyone else, but what if I don’t want to be like everyone else?

I know the results I want my life to produce – to help others, to inspire others and to make a difference – but I am not sure what actions to take, to produce these results.

My sister suggested going along to a movie with her, so I happily went along, not sure what to expect. What I encountered was a community of like-minded positive people gathered in a small yoga studio, with vegan treats and chai tea, huddled on bean bags to watch the movie Finding Joe. Afterwards everyone stayed around and talked to each other about the movie and about life. I was amazed in the power of Finding Joe – this movie allowed strangers to talk so openly and warmly to other strangers. It was one of the most beautiful things I have witnessed or ever been a part of.

If Finding Joe helped me realize one thing, it’s to never compromise. Your dreams are important and you need to listen to them. The people who tell you to go to university, to do post graduate studies, to get a well-paid job and live like the majority – they are the unlucky ones.

Joseph Campbell preaches to:

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The unlucky people ignore their calling, they choose not to acknowledge what their bliss may be, and in turn, they are the ones who won’t find bliss.

While these unlucky people may shake their heads and laugh at you, don’t let it compromise your hopes and dreams. Even if they tell you your plans are not realistic – don’t listen to them. Others settle for a life that’s just okay because they fear failure. They fear another opportunity will never come along so they just take whatever they can get, and live the safe life. But as Joseph Campbell said, you must go after your fear!

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The very next day after seeing Finding Joe, I withdrew my application for post graduate studies. I realised my applying for that position was not a step towards bliss, it was a step towards conformity. Yes, it may have got me a well-paid 9-5 job, but I want so much more than that.

Although I am not sure exactly what lays ahead of me, I’m determined to only make decisions that make my heart happy and I can confidently say that one day I will find my bliss. Those who said “that’s just a hobby, you can’t make a living doing that,” how wrong they will be.

A mediocre 9-5 job and an average life is not for me. I can’t settle for that. And I hope you won’t either. I hope you follow your passions, listen to your calling and chase your dreams.

It will be hard and you will struggle many times along the way, but as Joseph Campbell said:

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Let me assure you, it’s going to be okay. Or maybe it won’t be. Maybe instead of being okay, your life will be grand, magnificent and spectacular.

 

Those of you who wish to join me on my path, please follow my blog (you will see a subscribe section on the right hand side of the page up the top). You can also add some positivity to your Facebook newsfeed and hit the like button on my page (also up the top right).

I am focused on positivity, self-love and happiness, I love connecting with others who are similar, so I hope to hear from you!

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I wish you all peace, happiness, and so much love,

Kirstin xx

Allow Yourself to GROW

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I read somewhere that 50% of the people we have in our lives don’t want to see us do well. They don’t want to hear about your dreams, and if you still choose to tell them, they will tell you that you can’t do it, and secretly wish failure upon you. Roosh summarizes these people perfectly below:

They want you to fail because your success is their failure. It reminds them of their laziness, their poor work ethic. Their subtle jabs and withholding of encouragement are aimed to keep you in an inferior station. No one wants to see someone rise at faster speed than themselves.

There is no point in telling other people your goals. They will talk you out of it or give you bad advice. There is no point trying to convince others of your world view. They will plant seeds of doubts that prevent you from action and seeing the truth. The minute you go just slightly higher than you have been, they will try to sabotage you. They are the worrymongers, fearmongers, scaremongers, shamemongers, guilt-trippers, trolls, and haters. Ignore them. Feeding them brings you down to their level, which is exactly what they want.

Now as someone who is quite aware of those kind of people, I certainly don’t believe that 50% of the people in my life are like this at all. However I do know a few, and one in particular that definitely needs to be let go of.

I allow these people to remain in my life, even though I know they have served their purpose and it is time for me to move on. They remind me of the person I was, or the person I’m trying to move away from, and the familiarity I feel for them is probably what makes me keep them around.

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I’m challenging myself this weekend to say good bye to one of these people, to ask them not to contact me anymore. I need to do this for myself so that I can properly become the person I feel I am becoming. It will be hard, but if I don’t let go of this person, I feel my life and I will not grow.

I challenge all you amazing people this weekend to have a good think about if you have any of these kind of people in your life – ex lovers, friends, old colleagues, acquaintances etc. If you feel that a particular person does not help you grow or even inhibits you from growing, it’s time to cut the strings.

You may be comfortable where you are, surrounded by familiar people, but are these people wishing you well? Do they inspire you to set goals and achieve them, or do they try to hold you in the place you are in right now, not wanting you to grow because if you do, they are afraid they will lose you?

You need to do what’s best for yourself and surround yourself with the people who wish you well, who are happy for your successes, celebrate your victories and do not find joy in your failures. I’m sure you can look at the people in your life and know whether they help you grow or not.

So I encourage you to get up the strength to let go of the people that don’t wish you well, you’ll make room for the positive people in your life, and find it much easier to achieve your goals and dreams once you are surrounded by like minded people who want to see you climb mountains.

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Lots of love,

Kirstin xx

Stop Stressing!

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The importance of making decisions that have a positive impact on your wellbeing

By Bryana Cuthbert

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I have been a positive person most of my life. I had a box of quotes as a teenager and I practised what I preached. I surrounded myself with friends, did what I loved, got involved with the community and even fell in love. But when high school finished and I set off for uni, I began to struggle with what I still struggle with today and that is stress!

Yep I will admit it, I am a stress head!

I have spent good few years of my life stressed; stressed about work, stressed about uni and meeting deadlines, stressed about my living circumstances, stressed about wedding planning, stressed about finances… you name it!

But just recently, I have realised that stress isn’t inevitable, stress is a decision.

All these years I had made the decision that I was going to be stressed. Now looking back on it, it seems like I created a whole lot more pressure and anxiety than necessary, but I don’t regret it. I accept the past and am moving forward.

So I began making the conscious decision not to stress. When a potentially stressful circumstance arose I thought to myself, you know what, it is not worth stressing about, it will work out eventually. And – like letting go of a balloon – I mentally detached that stressor from my mind.

This did not work straight away; it took quite a few goes before I began to believe that it would work.

Next, I looked at what I had going on in my life. Yes, my life is very full – working 50 hour weeks, wedding planning, studying a double degree full time and getting ready to move. I realised I had too much going on and needed to free up some time where I could spend time with myself and de-stress. So I have deferred uni for this semester. At first I felt guilty about it, I thought it was a bad decision and that I shouldn’t do this. But then I realised that my well-being is more important, and I cannot simply continue living as stressed as I had been.

Deferring uni has opened up time in my life for things I enjoy, time for sunbaking and walking, aromatherapy and meditation, time with friends and family and my fiancé. And I began to feel less stressed! My mind is clearer and I no longer wake up worried about having enough time to do everything I need to do.

Everyone says that the mind is such a powerful thing, and it truly is. By making the conscious effort not to let myself stress (meditation has helped a lot with this), I became a more relaxed and happier person. The positive me is back and all aspects of my live have improved by making decisions that support my well-being, as well as giving up stress.

So if you are stressed, start small, recognise that you can choose to be stressed or not. Look at your life, if it is too full like mine was, recognise that something has to go, your well-being is a priority!

Take a step back; take a few deep breaths…

You were not created to live stressed, defeated, anxiety ridden or unworthy. You were created to be victorious!

Here’s to wellbeing and living life stress free!

Love Bryana x

100 Happy Days

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A little while ago I wrote a post about making time for the things that make you happy (you can click here to read it!).

One of my closest friends is using the ‘100 Happy Days’ Challenge as perfect example of this!  Jazmin found the challenge has helped help her find what it is that makes her happy and it also helped her recognise something good about every day, no matter how tired or stressed she was.

If you want to check her challenge out, head on over to her Instagram: @jazmingabby

And make sure to read her beautiful post below!

Lots of love, Kirstin x

 

100 Happy Days

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Recently I became very stressed, I started a new job and moved and I felt like I was constantly working for months on end!

I started doing the ‘100 Happy Days’ challenge to try to focus on the little things through my day that make me happy.

Coming home from a long shift, staying late and feeling so physically and mentally exhausted (being an RN on a surgical ward!); I would normally just switch off and watch TV or have a nap.  I realised that I had no time for me that day, and switching off will just make the tiredness worse.

So, now when coming home I do something that makes me happy, something I love.

Another thing I realised was that I figured out what things actually make ME happy. Everyone is different, and the things that make me happy are creative and low-key, and that’s ok.

Most of the people I talk to my age say that they have fun by grabbing a huge group of friends and going drinking. Personally, I could not think of anything worse. I enjoy things like quilting, makeup artistry, reading, cooking and gardening. Socially, I like having small dinners with friends and hanging out shopping or watching a movie.

Image's from Jazmin's Instagram: @jazmingabby

Image’s from Jazmin’s Instagram: @jazmingabby

Accepting what I like and actually doing it and not feeling that I have to fit in what everyone else likes, is important. I know it’s clichéd, but my main point is BE YOURSELF, the only thing that will make you happy, truly happy within yourself is being who you are.

Never mind what people think, never worry about the judgement of others, because the people who mind don’t matter, and the people who matter don’t mind.

If you’d like to sign up to do the ‘100 Happy Days’ challenge you can here; http://100happydays.com/

Have a happy day Jaz xoxo